Living in Wonju South Korea, These Many Long Years

Living in Wonju South Korea, These Many Long Years: Version 2.0!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Advice!

One of my friends met me for lunch to ask for advice.

It seems she's been dating one of her older supervisors, and is somewhat out of synch with what to do.

She claims it's love.  They started dating while he was still married.  He recently divorced, and now wants her to move in with him.

I know a little more about the story than she brought up.  I keep my ear close to the ground on a lot of gossip; this is one of the advantages of being plugged into the ajumma network.  Word in the coffee shop is that this guy is quite a hound, and that his wife dumped him because he got a much younger university student pregnant.  Said woman went off somewhere to have the kid.  Not before writing a rather terse letter to the wife.

Thing is my friend knows about that.  But she doesn't know about the two others before her.

It's a messed up situation. 

Without bringing in everything that I knew, I asked her where she was going to see herself in 5 years, or 10.

Is moving in with this guy going to cause your life to go in a direction that could mess it up, seeing you miss out on opportunities for work or self development that you'll never be able to regain?  You keep talking about getting your Masters, do you think you'll be able to if you move in with this guy?  What if you got pregnant?

Even if you didn't, is it really worth the fleeting passion?  When you're old saying that you lived true to your heart, it won't change the fact that you could be living in hell, or missed out on the chance to meet someone else.  That is the great thing about life, you never know what's around the corner.  Besides, you know that he is a hound.  Do you really think you're going to be the one forever?  Have your fun, but keep your perspective.

Kinda seems like a no brainer to me, but that is love now isn't it.  I suppose it could work out, but she should just walk away and get on with her life.

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